Overwhelmed would be an understatement and roller coaster would be a tame ride compared to what the past months have brought our way, but I don’t regret wading into the unknown for all the right reasons. I am, however, discouraged by finding systems that ought to bless, instead hindering a good effort at a new life.
Walk with me back to December when we found a young man needing a place to be. I’ve never considered adoption or fostering kids in any real way; not from a cold heart, but from an already full life and schedule. However, this all came about in such a way that Erick and I both felt the call of Christ to open our home and set another place at the table. So we did.
We waded into deep waters of the unknown and have tried to act in love and wisdom when faced with the many challenges we’ve since encountered.
It has all unfolded one step, one moment, at a time.
Just as we had no forewarning that this need would come and we would be called upon to answer, we faced another request from our new, young family member. He said he needed a clean start all the way around. He cited our home as one place of beginning again, but he said he needed another; a new school where he had no past connections. We love the school he left and the one he went to. Both are good places filled with good, caring, solid people who are investing in his life. We could have refused to move him, but he had some credible and painful reasons for making the request. We listened, and we enrolled him in a new school.
We’ve hit quite a snag. His lifeline has been sports for a long time. He loves ball and loves to be a member of a team. He loves to play and to feel the freedom of the field and the court. We love to watch him. He looks so much older than his 14 years, but getting to know him we’ve grown to love the boy that he is. Don’t let those big, strong shoulders fool you. There’s a young boy inside with a great big, tender heart that just wants to to be whole.
We were warned he might not be able to play for a year given that we moved from one school in the county to another. We asked about exceptions and we read some things that seemed to indicate he could play if certain conditions were met and we were actively working toward making that happen. From the beginning, I’ve asked for a meeting with the governing authority because I realize the circumstances are quite unique. I have been told no to a meeting from the AAHSA or even a phone call with them. I find this quite unprofessional and frankly, uncaring. I realize that there are people who try to do unethical things to stack teams with talented athletes. However, there is none of that going on with this case, and this is common knowledge to everyone who were privy to its unfolding (including some local attorneys and a judge).
It gets even more absurd when I learn that had DHR been involved in placing the child in a foster home, he would be allowed to play, but because we went the route of obtaining permanent custody (DHR’s recommendation) he is not afforded the same right to play. Make this make sense to the one I’m caring about. How about make it make sense to me…
I’ve been called a rule follower, and I guess I pretty much am. I’m respectful of authority, but that doesn’t mean that I can’t see that some rules and some laws are unjust, unfair, and simply unkind. I wonder when I ‘m sorting through my own concerns for this young boy why I’m not granted some time to discuss this with those who make and enforce the rules. Maybe because it’s much easier to justify when you don’t have to count the personal cost to a real live kid. When I’m told these rules were established because so many are dishonest, I think about the 99 and the 1. The Good Shepherd left the 99 to find the one lost sheep making clear for us the significance, the worth, and the value of a single life. Some rules need to be changed. Some laws need to be changed. If no one ever challenges the system, it never will change. I have but one request, Let Key Play. He’s just a kid who has suffered more in his short life than most suffer in 70 years. I’m not here to talk about the sports-crazed adults in the world or the kids they raise to be the same. I’m just a concerned advocate for a kid The Lord has brought into my heart; a kid that loves to play. I won’t stop asking and I won’t stop hoping. Others should join me. Every child matters.